for two months i have not written here, and i'm embarrassed. it's like the couple who doesn't have sex for so long they are shy getting out of the shower while the other one brushes teeth. hypothetically speaking.
several times i have had moment when i had words bouncing around in my brain with such fierceness i could have filled pages, but rather than sit to type i folding laundry while listening to the soft rock love song station. even as i did this i would think "why am i doing this?!" yes, a chicago song can be an interesting walk down memory lane with ralph machio as your escort. however, if a person listens to that kind of ear noise everyday strange things happen. like you stop writing in your blog.
until you read another mama's blog and feel that little panicky pang of jealousy/inspiration.
then you find yourself boldly pressing "new post" with very little to actually write about. i don't have a story to tell. i can't even remember anything witty my boys have said to me recently. my brain is in the white wash zone of nothingness- that place when you wake up and aren't sure where you are for a split second as your brain recreates the last conscious moments, trying to remember if you are on the couch or in your toddler's bed.
it's like that- a nothingness is here now, but i know it will fade and a somethingness will be there. i think when my eyes adjust and my fingers warm up i will have something worthwhile to write about, so please stay tuned.